On Recalibration, Shifting Gears Fluidly and Moving Forward With Determination

On Recalibration, Shifting Gears Fluidly and Moving Forward With Determination

Greetings!………

…….and here is to new beginnings everyone!   First of all, I must apologize for hiding in the garage most of the time for pretty much 39 months now and being so silent.  A lot was going on these last few years and I guess you could say that my lady  was in the process of recalibrating, learning how, for actually the first time, to shift into the correct gear and let the engine of the universe do most of the work.  Suffice it to say that she has been fighting the transmission most of our lives; this has not been easy for me to witness.  She seems like she has finally fell into a gear in which she is comfortable, at least for the present time.  I know the calm may not last long because I know for sure that she is now in her “thinking and planning” phase.  Once she is done “thinking and planning” I can rest assured that her foot will be in my carburetor again!

I am hopeful though that  her thinking and planning phase will give me the opportunity to fill you in much more on what we both have learned over the past three years and three months and what I think is coming up over the next three to six years in our lives.  I really do feel that documenting some of the experiences that have touched our lives might actually help pave a road for some of you to navigate through life’s hair pin curves a little easier than we had because frankly, I wound up spinning my back wheels in a couple of roadside ditches over the past few years.  But we made it out eventually, even if we needed some human assistance in getting out now and then.

So fasten your seat belts and as those of you who love roller coasters like the Texas Giant at Six Flags as much as my lady does know, you should “keep your arms and legs inside the car at all times and do not stand up………..”

Many happy RPMs,

The Car

On Downshifting and Letting Go

Good Morning Everyone!
Greetings here from the curb–it is a lovely day here although a bit colder than usual. Fall is definitely setting in and winter is coming. Will someone out there please tell my lady that if she intends to park me at the curb through the winter I will need a more substantial cover? Something with a soft flannel inside would be nice. Honestly, she had to know I was a bit grumpy yesterday morning when she tried to get me to turn over. But then again, I know she was a bit out of sorts yesterday because she jumped in and woke me up right away. Usually, she lets me ponder and purr a bit but this morning and yesterday she was all business. I know better than the complain when that is the case, so I just moved into gear and away from the curb on command.

I overheard her speaking to one of her close friends yesterday, so I know that she has been worrying over and missing especially her dear friend who passed away almost nine years ago now. Well, maybe worrying is not the right word; after all her good friend has passed on to the next life. Actually, I think my lady is distraught and I think she is feeling like she needs to properly let go finally after all these years. But it is hard for my lady. She loves unconditionally and the bond that she and her good friend shared was singular and about as deep as our love for each other. Something like that is rare for sure and I know that the reason my lady has such a hard time downshifting (well, I call it downshifting but maybe most of you refer to it as “letting go”) at certain times in our lives–she misses her dear friend too much. Consequently, it looks like I may have to take the wheel for a bit here, no pun intended. While I am driving, let me cogitate a bit over the question of what exactly is unconditional love and what happens to a person when someone one loves that dearly passes away. This is a fairly complicated topic, especially where my lady is concerned. I promise to write more tonight when I think this through. In the meantime, I just saw my lady speaking to the manager of the service station where she gives me my weekly bath. Turns out that she is trying to get a job detailing the cars there at the car wash. They thought she was kidding, but when she told them she was not joking, they did give her an application. Well, at least her children won’t starve and I won’t go thirsty either–or lack my weekly bath if she is successful at getting some hours there!

TTYL,

The Car

On Garagelessness, CB Radios, Batman and Fairy Tales

I cannot believe that all this time has passed since my first post. Please forgive me for the long hiatus but I was a bit preoccupied taking care of my lady. She and I have been through some major changes lately–or, rather, I should say an emotional and physical metamorphosis of sorts. Oh, the metamorphosis was long, long overdue and is the culmination of about seven or eight years of steady work but even though that is the case, the actual morphing out of the chrysalis has been a bit frustrating and sometimes unnerving. The changes have catapulted me right back to the curb where she at least very lovingly covered me up today lest the hot sun beat down on me and damage my paint. The shock of it all is over now–I am garageless once again! Only this time, it may be a while before she can find a new home for me and the family. She seems pretty stoic about everything and as long as we are together I know she will be okay. I will take care of her, I always do. We are one, she and I, and we both know we could not live without the other, not for very long anyway.
So all of this has got me to thinking–what is it that is important in this lifetime? What fairly tale are we all chasing? To answer this I would have to remember what she once told me shortly after we met that day in the new car lot at the dealership. She admitted that as early as age seven she never felt like she was wanted anywhere or by anyone, and she could not wait to forge a life for herself where she felt that she could create a wonderful space for herself and her loved ones. She wanted to feel safe and wanted in her life space, that was important to her–and I think this is important to all of us. I know I was part of her plan to find that place, and for thirty-three years now we have been together through thick and thin. She has always taken me with her, and we have had some pretty nice garages to live in along the way. Perhaps the one in NYC was the most exciting. I still remember the load of lumber from the renovations at the Hotel Ansonia on West 73rd Street being dropped on my hood by the person doing the loading in the garage. Boy, was she mad about that! She made the hotel owner pay for the damages that time! And the garage at the home outside the City was pretty nice too and then one on the West Coast was small, but okay. But the personal life did not go well for us there in New York at all and we had to leave that lovely garage with the attached home and that is what sent us westward, quite by the turn of events. That New York stint was certainly a fairly tale without a happy ending. But before we left that lovely garage outside the City, I remember something that happened that was extremely important and it catapulted us on the trajectory that brought us here, to this emotional set point.

We were on one of our “rides to nowhere” as I recall it. She had been very upset that night and had taken me out for a dive on I-84. We had just driven to the 84 Diner and were on our way back north when she flipped on the radio to see if anyone was on that night. There was a group of folks chatting and after only a few minutes, we both figured out that the folks were talking about how they felt about their significant others. Now, we always made sure that we stayed pretty quiet so as not to blow our cover–after all, I am a four-wheeler and we always did want to be respectful. But this particular evening, when one of the parties on the radio proclaimed (in speaking about his wife) that he had been with the same woman for thirty-four years and she looked better to him every day and their relationship had gotten better by the day as well, she blurted something into the radio that I will never forget. Without even announcing us properly to the conversation, she exclaimed pretty emphatically that he should tell her that right away–that he should not wait a minute before letting her know that. Well, I just thought “Oh crap–what the heck did she open her mouth for?” She is the opinionated type! Of course, she, the quiet type with the CB handle, the Camaro Kid, who only announced herself to do a radio check every so often, then had to identify us at which point our cover was blown for the first time in about twenty-five years. But I learned something about her that night and I think she learned something about herself too. She finally had to acknowledge how bad our emotional lives had become because that which she wanted most of all had eluded her all these years. Even after she built that wonderful garage with the home and the yard we lived in. She was a wreck from the moment after she made that statement with such urgency. Unfortunately, she was still behind the wheel and I could not get her to pull over. Luckily, one of the other drivers was able to get us off the road where she calmed down. Honestly, I think she soaked my carpet from all the tears that flowed that night. She knew we had no choice but to leave our garage. I am still very much thankful for the person who pulled her over that night. I think he saved our lives, she was in no condition to be driving since she was so upset. We met the driver of that truck a few times at the 84 Diner for coffee and waffles after that night before we left New York. I recall on the last meeting he gave us a Rand McNally Road Atlas which she still has even after she got rid of almost every other book she ever owned. And she gave the driver her favorite Batman pin to keep to remind him of us. We often wonder how he is doing, whether his family is okay and whether he still has the pin which she used to keep right in between the two front visors on my headliner. He will always have a special place in our hearts.

Today,as we venture into yet the next phase of our lives, garageless once more, I know one thing for sure–things will certainly improve for the better because for the first time in the last seven years, I have noticed a huge change in my lady. I think she has finally figured out–after all these years–that she and I actually deserve to be happy. And now, by golly, I think that she has finally figured out how to make sure that happens for us…………………..

Have a magical evening!

The Car