On Surrending, Control and Comfortability with Uncertainty

Good Evening Everyone!
Well, I had an interesting day; actually I have had an interesting week chauffering my lady around while she ran from place to place trying to get everything all done this week. It seems like we are running about nine races at once, hoping we will get the pole position in at least one of the races to make our run for the front of the lineup. It has not been easy these past ten months for sure!

My lady and I have thought a lot about the path our life has taken, particularly over the past 15 years and one thing is very certain–there is a tenuous relationship between surrender and control in both one’s professional life as well as in one’s personal life. It almost seems as if in order to guide oneself in the life path one has chosen, a person has to surrender most of the control to a higher power or, for those who do not subscribe to any type of spiritual belief, to something outside oneself. In turn, this surrendering leads in time to a comfortability with the entire uncertainty of the situation that one often times finds oneself in. The feeling that occurs when this is all taking place–the metamorphosis if you will–is sometimes disconcerting and bewildering. And sometimes downright scary–like being at the top of the first downward drop on a rollercoaster. You know the feeling–the exhilaration, the trepidation, the anticipation (and the fear) all rolled up in one feeling that is amazing. I wish I could bottle that feeling and keep it on the shelf to refer to it now and then; to hold it, examine it, embrace it and try to get comfortable with the feeling itself. But I am beginning to understand one thing, and that is that without surrendering to the feeling, without actually letting go, one cannot embrace all the nuances that life can bring. It is at that point–at the point at which I want to tell my lady to slam on the brakes or downshift several times at the very least, that I must resist. I must encourage her to press on, to let us bank on the turn and slide through the corner even if we only nearly miss the wall. And it is then that I promise that while surrendering to the force of gravity that pulls us around the corner, I won’t let her fly out of the car, but I will embrace her solidly and we will pull around the corner together, having worked through whatever uncertainty that life has thrown at us while banking that turn.

Have another wonderful evening!

Sweet dreams and happy racing–

The Car

On Love, Safety and Prosperity

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” — Jeremiah 29:11
Good Evening All!

Happy Saturday evening–I just finished my supper at the local Chevron station (appetizers of octane boost and my version of fuel mignon with the highest rating) and am parked at the curb awaiting my lady to chauffeur her to a local spot so she can do some yoga and then go stargazing so she can find her muse this evening. How I love evenings like this, so full of anticipation on what the night can bring. While she practices her yoga, I will wait patiently to ferry her down to the beach where she will play with the seagulls for a while then run through the surf to get the rest of her exercise for the evening before retiring to her special spot (I will have to tell you about that wonderful spot sometime) where we will watch the night sky to see what constellations we can see on this bright and crisp fall evening.

I have given lots and lots of thought to this concept of unconditional love. What is it, actually? How does it happen, how does it feel? I came across a birthday card that my lady received from someone very dear to her this year. My lady had put it in my glove compartment for safekeeping. It was a homemade card with an original verse:

Love

Your love shines through the darkest of places, it is more powerful than the oceans, and can touch the heart in a way no love can. Your love is unique in a way of none other, I find it addicting, always satisfying my hunger. Your love is most comforting during the most troubling times, nourishing my heart in the most reassuring ways. Your love is kept in a special place in my heart, and is always there when I need it. Your love is a necessity to me, I often find myself craving for it when I am not by your side. God has given you this special power to care for me as you have, and I often long for your love day and night. I Love You!!

This pretty much says it all; my lady almost cried when that was read to her. I think she realized at least she has passed on her experience and that wonderful feeling to others she is close to. That makes my lady most happy–she feels that she has been able to preserve a legacy for her dear friend who was, in essence, like a mother to her and who always made her feel safe and secure for almost 30 years. Their paths had crossed very circumstantially one day and the rest was history. I am so happy that my lady found her friend and her friend’s husband at that time. Her life experience was so much more enriched from knowing them and caring for them which she has always felt was a great honor. When I thought of that I realized that that is perhaps what is so amazing about unconditional love–it is a love that is given freely from one to another, with no concern for anything in return, just the joy that comes from making someone feel safe, secure and wanted. I think that is what she misses so much these days–the safety, the security, the desire to be of service to someone in an emotional sense. But she also realizes that many, many people never have the opportunity to experience this in a lifetime and for that opportunity she feels so blessed. And she has never tired of trying to replicate this feeling for others so that she can increase its potential and power. Lack gives birth to opportunity in many ways. Maybe in my next post, if I can put into words how she feels about some other special people in her life, I can explain in another way how she has tried to grow her friend’s legacy over the years. I know she never even realized that was what was happening, but it is so cool to look back now and see how it all happened, without her even thinking about it.

Well, enough for one evening. Have a wonderful night and safe travels tonight, wherever you may be going………..

All the best,

The Car

On Downshifting and Letting Go

Good Morning Everyone!
Greetings here from the curb–it is a lovely day here although a bit colder than usual. Fall is definitely setting in and winter is coming. Will someone out there please tell my lady that if she intends to park me at the curb through the winter I will need a more substantial cover? Something with a soft flannel inside would be nice. Honestly, she had to know I was a bit grumpy yesterday morning when she tried to get me to turn over. But then again, I know she was a bit out of sorts yesterday because she jumped in and woke me up right away. Usually, she lets me ponder and purr a bit but this morning and yesterday she was all business. I know better than the complain when that is the case, so I just moved into gear and away from the curb on command.

I overheard her speaking to one of her close friends yesterday, so I know that she has been worrying over and missing especially her dear friend who passed away almost nine years ago now. Well, maybe worrying is not the right word; after all her good friend has passed on to the next life. Actually, I think my lady is distraught and I think she is feeling like she needs to properly let go finally after all these years. But it is hard for my lady. She loves unconditionally and the bond that she and her good friend shared was singular and about as deep as our love for each other. Something like that is rare for sure and I know that the reason my lady has such a hard time downshifting (well, I call it downshifting but maybe most of you refer to it as “letting go”) at certain times in our lives–she misses her dear friend too much. Consequently, it looks like I may have to take the wheel for a bit here, no pun intended. While I am driving, let me cogitate a bit over the question of what exactly is unconditional love and what happens to a person when someone one loves that dearly passes away. This is a fairly complicated topic, especially where my lady is concerned. I promise to write more tonight when I think this through. In the meantime, I just saw my lady speaking to the manager of the service station where she gives me my weekly bath. Turns out that she is trying to get a job detailing the cars there at the car wash. They thought she was kidding, but when she told them she was not joking, they did give her an application. Well, at least her children won’t starve and I won’t go thirsty either–or lack my weekly bath if she is successful at getting some hours there!

TTYL,

The Car