On Beginning, Moving On, Bluebirds, Throttles and Downshifting

Greetings again friends!

I hope everyone is well this lovely evening! I promised in my last post to tell you the story about the bluebirds, so here it is. Have you ever wondered why bluebirds are referred to as the “Bluebirds of Happiness”? And, perhaps most importantly, how many of you have actually seen a real bluebird in its outdoor habitat? I would venture a guess that not many of you have. Yet for years, the bluebird has been a symbol of prosperity, good health and happiness. There are bluebird statues, bluebird cookie dishes, bluebird nesting boxes put up in open meadows and backyards for the sole purpose of attempting to attract this somewhat elusive creature to one’s environment. My lady had even put up a bluebird nesting box in her backyard at one time which she had pretty much turned into a backyard bird sanctuary, complete with feeders, flowers which attracted certain types of birds and all types of nesting boxes and woodland arrangements that small birds and all types of critters could overwinter in. Prior to the bluebird sighting I am going to tell you about, my lady and I had only seen bluebirds–three of them–a few times in the yard after we had put in the bird sanctuary. So, this time was really special. Special because it was in the middle of a blinding snowstorm that we sighted three bluebirds huddling in a barren tree next to the deck of the house! Yes, my lady had been worrying a bit more than usual because she and the children were stranded in their home during a blizzard with no transportation out, little funds and no hope for any relief for the next 24 to 48 hours as the snow kept swirling about. She was asking the universe to send a sign–anything–to give her hope that their lives would soon improve, when all of a sudden those three bluebirds swooped down onto the tree, huddled together and stared right at her through the kitchen window!! My lady stood there staring at these wonderful birds for about two full minutes and when she blinked to make sure she was not “seeing things” they were still there! Smiling, she silently figured she had her sign and took that to mean that the course that was about to be charted in her life and her children’s lives would ultimately lead her to happiness, even though at the time the emotional pain she felt was almost visibly palpable in her countenance. However, what she did not know at that time was that the happiness would not be an end in itself (which was what she was hoping for), but that she and her children (all six of them) would find happiness all along the way during the journey that she and they were going to embark on. In fact, little did she know that it would take her almost a decade to grow and understand enough to experience joy for the first time in her life and definitely a decade to break free from the emotional shackles that kept her from enjoying life. She was also going to have to become comfortable with uncertainty–something she had never been good at–in order to experience true joy. But once she did experience that joy, nothing could ever hurt her again–at least in a lasting sense. So I guess this is the most important part of our story together, these last ten years. I promise to collect my thoughts enough over the next few days so that I can more eloquently tell our story which is still unfolding, in greater detail. In the meantime, my lady continues to pick up speed enjoying life full throttle despite the obstacles and challenges that are being sent our way. In fact, I have to keep reminding her to downshift adequately at appropriate times lest we fly off our course!

Sweet dreams everyone–I look forward to chatting again soon!

The Car

On Emblems, Eagles and Freedom

Good Evening All! Well, here I am tucked in again under my trusty car cover. My lady and I had a great weekend! She entered me in a car show, something she told me she would never do. In fact, this was the second one she entered me in during my whole life so far–and all within two months; she always said she likes to drive me more than she likes to sit and look at me, even though I am one of the “unwanted” second generation Camaros. Not really worth all that much to most people, even those who love Camaros. But that does not matter to her, she loves me anyway, I know.
While we were at the show this weekend, I overheard her talking to someone and she was asking this person what they thought attracted everyone to the Camaro. After all, we are different than Stangs or Vettes for sure, even though the new fifth generation Camaros can give either a new Cobra or an ’09 ZR1 a good run for its money. She, of course, already knew what attracted foks to the Camaro, I know that. She just wanted to see what someone else thought. The person she was talking to did not miss a chance to give her his opinion–it was the freedom he said. I think he called the Camaro an “emblem of freedom” and my lady was in total agreement. The Camaro is an emblem of the free spirit that exists in everyone but which only a few people actually act on during their lifetimes.

Let’s think about this for a moment. I have noticed that my lady is pretty adamant about making sure nothing represses that free spirited consciousness and the happiness that both of us enjoy. Not that she has shirked her responsibilities in life, on the contrary, she has been steadfast in adhering to these responsibilities, many times to the detriment of her (and my) own desires and wishes. The heavens know that I have certainly enjoyed my own dose of reality when she stuffed all those children and groceries from her 3 a.m. runs to Stop & Shop in my backseat–how many did we raise anyway???? I lost track at six. I think that if there was one thing that my lady would totally agree with it is the fact that everyone needs to grab each and every opportunity in life to feel real joy and excitement, no matter what is going on in one’s life. And by golly, if there is no excitement there, she’d go out and create it just for us. If she had her way, she would counsel everyone not to worry, get anxious and otherwise stress over those things one cannot control (which is just about everything). I always hear her talking to herself, telling herself to remember that the only thing she can really control is what she thinks and feels about a situation. Of course, I always oblige to help her out when she slinks behind the wheel and turns the key in the ignition to take one of our “drives to nowhere” as she refers to them. That is the way she unwinds and gets back into our groove.

I specifically recall one of our drives during which we picked up an eagle that flew alongside with us for hours. Yes, it was a bald eagle on top of it all–the quintessential emblem of our domestic liberty! I knew that my lady had the ability to attract animals, and birds in particular, and this phenomenon had been occurring all her life. What was particularly interesting about this sighting was the fact that she recognized that it looked like the eagle was leading us and we were following. It was the children that noticed it first and they were so excited. The eagle was with us for hours as we travelled through the Texas panhandle and into New Mexico on that drive, leaving us only at Gila Bend when we stopped for a respite at The Space Age Hotel. It was pretty cool to see that. My lady and that eagle seemed to understand each other and the eagle at one time came pretty darn close to the driver side door as he was flying. She reached out and almost touched the bird at that point, much to the amazement of everyone else in the car. They had a connection that was wonderful to witness. I think to this day that that eagle was a messenger from the universe sent to let us know that we were ultimately on the right road of life and that we would be okay, even though we did not know where we were going, had little money and had no idea what we were going to do when we got to whatever destination was ultimately waiting for us. I think that eagle picked up where the winter bluebirds had left off; I will have to tell you about those bluebirds some time soon–maybe in my next post–and was a precursor to the hummingbirds that would ultimately befriend us at our new home which was yet unknown to us. That day will forever live in our memories as one of the most special times we shared on a drive. And it is a perfect memory of what both I and my fellow Camaros are for many folks–not just my lady–the emblem of freedom that means so much to so many people.

Sweet dreams and happy beginnings,

The Car

On Garagelessness, CB Radios, Batman and Fairy Tales

I cannot believe that all this time has passed since my first post. Please forgive me for the long hiatus but I was a bit preoccupied taking care of my lady. She and I have been through some major changes lately–or, rather, I should say an emotional and physical metamorphosis of sorts. Oh, the metamorphosis was long, long overdue and is the culmination of about seven or eight years of steady work but even though that is the case, the actual morphing out of the chrysalis has been a bit frustrating and sometimes unnerving. The changes have catapulted me right back to the curb where she at least very lovingly covered me up today lest the hot sun beat down on me and damage my paint. The shock of it all is over now–I am garageless once again! Only this time, it may be a while before she can find a new home for me and the family. She seems pretty stoic about everything and as long as we are together I know she will be okay. I will take care of her, I always do. We are one, she and I, and we both know we could not live without the other, not for very long anyway.
So all of this has got me to thinking–what is it that is important in this lifetime? What fairly tale are we all chasing? To answer this I would have to remember what she once told me shortly after we met that day in the new car lot at the dealership. She admitted that as early as age seven she never felt like she was wanted anywhere or by anyone, and she could not wait to forge a life for herself where she felt that she could create a wonderful space for herself and her loved ones. She wanted to feel safe and wanted in her life space, that was important to her–and I think this is important to all of us. I know I was part of her plan to find that place, and for thirty-three years now we have been together through thick and thin. She has always taken me with her, and we have had some pretty nice garages to live in along the way. Perhaps the one in NYC was the most exciting. I still remember the load of lumber from the renovations at the Hotel Ansonia on West 73rd Street being dropped on my hood by the person doing the loading in the garage. Boy, was she mad about that! She made the hotel owner pay for the damages that time! And the garage at the home outside the City was pretty nice too and then one on the West Coast was small, but okay. But the personal life did not go well for us there in New York at all and we had to leave that lovely garage with the attached home and that is what sent us westward, quite by the turn of events. That New York stint was certainly a fairly tale without a happy ending. But before we left that lovely garage outside the City, I remember something that happened that was extremely important and it catapulted us on the trajectory that brought us here, to this emotional set point.

We were on one of our “rides to nowhere” as I recall it. She had been very upset that night and had taken me out for a dive on I-84. We had just driven to the 84 Diner and were on our way back north when she flipped on the radio to see if anyone was on that night. There was a group of folks chatting and after only a few minutes, we both figured out that the folks were talking about how they felt about their significant others. Now, we always made sure that we stayed pretty quiet so as not to blow our cover–after all, I am a four-wheeler and we always did want to be respectful. But this particular evening, when one of the parties on the radio proclaimed (in speaking about his wife) that he had been with the same woman for thirty-four years and she looked better to him every day and their relationship had gotten better by the day as well, she blurted something into the radio that I will never forget. Without even announcing us properly to the conversation, she exclaimed pretty emphatically that he should tell her that right away–that he should not wait a minute before letting her know that. Well, I just thought “Oh crap–what the heck did she open her mouth for?” She is the opinionated type! Of course, she, the quiet type with the CB handle, the Camaro Kid, who only announced herself to do a radio check every so often, then had to identify us at which point our cover was blown for the first time in about twenty-five years. But I learned something about her that night and I think she learned something about herself too. She finally had to acknowledge how bad our emotional lives had become because that which she wanted most of all had eluded her all these years. Even after she built that wonderful garage with the home and the yard we lived in. She was a wreck from the moment after she made that statement with such urgency. Unfortunately, she was still behind the wheel and I could not get her to pull over. Luckily, one of the other drivers was able to get us off the road where she calmed down. Honestly, I think she soaked my carpet from all the tears that flowed that night. She knew we had no choice but to leave our garage. I am still very much thankful for the person who pulled her over that night. I think he saved our lives, she was in no condition to be driving since she was so upset. We met the driver of that truck a few times at the 84 Diner for coffee and waffles after that night before we left New York. I recall on the last meeting he gave us a Rand McNally Road Atlas which she still has even after she got rid of almost every other book she ever owned. And she gave the driver her favorite Batman pin to keep to remind him of us. We often wonder how he is doing, whether his family is okay and whether he still has the pin which she used to keep right in between the two front visors on my headliner. He will always have a special place in our hearts.

Today,as we venture into yet the next phase of our lives, garageless once more, I know one thing for sure–things will certainly improve for the better because for the first time in the last seven years, I have noticed a huge change in my lady. I think she has finally figured out–after all these years–that she and I actually deserve to be happy. And now, by golly, I think that she has finally figured out how to make sure that happens for us…………………..

Have a magical evening!

The Car